FTSE Dow, Football Up

Now that I've finally got some motivation and I've stopped sobbing about the relentless decline of the Dow Jones (he's an odd Welshman) I've decided to write a bit, so I think I'll start with the England game the other day. We won, which was nice, and in quite convincing fashion (at least in the last 30 minutes). It was also pleasing to see just how shite Ashley Cole is too, and how Chelsea have ruined yet another Englishman. Hyperbole, maybe, but fuck it I really do dislike Chelsea, and it seems quite obvious to me how Wright-Phillips and Glenn Johnson along with others like Sidwell and even our own Scott "the torso" Parker have been held back at international level by not getting enough playing time at home. Is there any doubt that no England player selected should ever ever ever ever ever be someone on a club team's bench. The only exception I can fathom is when Owen was at Real Madrid and knocking in more goals per minute on the pitch than Ronaldo and Raul. Anyway yeah Cole was pants, not just for the back pass but 3 of the Kazak's best chances were all due to his bad positioning or error in tackling; at times he left the defence as wide open as Cheryl Tweedy's legs.

The game also saw the reintroduction of Steve Gerrard and Frank Wankhard together in the midfield which was particularly interesting after Wankhard's comments to the press a few days before the game saying that he and Gerrard haven't played well together. The two hardly set the world alight with their display, and against better opposition may have been exposed more. Wankhard did enough by passing quite well and staying away from the Kazak's pie-eating contest by the dug-out, Gerrard tried to do too much and lost out a number of times by trying to force things along - he is possibly sensing his place slipping after being out through injury. So everybody will now go back and start picking sides again, which one is better blah blah blah, I'm going with Gerrard and don't feel like saying why, so there.

Heskey returned to the fray, and I quite predictably shit myself upon announcement that he would be starting. Fair play to him he gets on with everything he's told to do except score goals - he has a staggering 5 goals from 47 appearances, of which only two were in non-friendly games, of which one was in the 5-1 drubbing of Germany - and in that game my Nan got a goal, which you should recall was wiped out when FIFA found her Irish passport and questioned her ability to represent England. She had argued that she thought Germany were letting in goals "for a laugh" that day, but FIFA were having none of it.
My rather drawn out point is what the fuck is Emile Heskey doing in an England shirt? I don't question his commitment, but there has to be someone better out there to partner Rooney. Heskey has scored once this season, and that was against newly promoted Hull City (Christ I hope I haven't jinxed this Sunday), even Carlton Cole has done better than that, in fact he's done better than that in the last two games he's played. Defoe, Davies, Owen, Agbonglahor, and Cole all have more goals than he does this season, and all of them have at least equalled (if not surpassed) his massive contribution of 3 goals for his club last year - his selection is pure insanity and makes no sense to me, the only person I see him assisting (if that's your argument) is Owen, but Rooney isn't a "knock it down for me" player, he's not a poacher, he's a craft and graft talisman. Capello, if this blog is your required reading in your English language college class, please please please stop selecting Heskey in your squad; both he and David James are hardly the future of English football.

On a brighter note Matty Upson got a full 90 minutes and played really well. He was solid at the back sticking in a couple of tackles, and if I remember correctly he distracted the keeper for Rio's goal, and was within two touches of the ball in two of the other goals. Well done to "the rock," his display was encouraging for Capello I'm sure, and in my biased mind he proved he is worth an appearance if not a start in the next international fixutre.

Overall I thought it was a decent performance from England, and the amount of goals you'd expect against a team of Kazakhstan's calibre. But fair play to the Kazaks, they came to Wembley and did well against a far superior team, took to the pitch without a single mention of Borat, and did their country proud by putting in a steely performance only to be outdone by fitness levels and amount of possession. And at the end of the day I bet their team know where our country is and can probably name our capital, bet our players can't do the same for them - minus the genius that is Robert Green, I mean he probably runs a shelter over there or something, you know how he is.